My boyfriend cheated!

Life Dating & Relationships
41

[quote=“rooftop”]So what do you do when one half of the relationship earns 5~7 times what the other half does?

Serious question.

On most average Taiwanese salaries our boyfriends/girlfriends could never accompany their foreign partners to even a fraction of the events/places we like to go.

Sorry, I’m not into night markets and window shopping…

Twonavels, sorry to hear that happened to you. Pretty sketchy.[/quote]

Besides the fact that I obviously have the wrong job since I don’t make anywhere near 5~7 times what my lowest paid full-time employed bf made; there are better places than night markets to shop which are less expensive than SOGO and nice but less expensive places to eat than Western restaurants. Walks in the parks are free, entrance fees to museums, etc. are reasonable. Trips by train or bus are relatively inexpensive and there are plenty of reasonably priced accommodations throughout Taiwan for those weekend getaways.
I don’t go to concerts so I don’t know about those. Bars and clubs, once you get past the entrance fee, are really up to you. My bf doesn’t drink so his tab isn’t the problem when we go out clubbing :wink: .
Naturally I pay for both of us sometimes but I make sure we go to some places where he can pay to avoid any loss of face or resentment from him.
The first several false starts I had in relationships in Taiwan ended when they expected me to pay for everything or they wanted to move in within a week of meeting.

42

[quote]I couldn’t help it, he does have all the qualities you mentioned. The bj was mind-blowing.
[/quote]

So were you the one who put the bite marks into the head of my vibrator, Okami? :stuck_out_tongue:
Actually I was thinking I should be dating gregsoul next, as he also seems to enjoy discussing his mating rituals online, but I see he’s got a date with a hot aerobics instructor this weekend.
So today I joined California instead. Fit and single, that’s the future. :smiley:

43

Tohoho! :wink: :notworthy:

44

[quote=“twonavels”]A man is only fine until you fall for him and get close enough to see all the flaws. Then you break up and he becomes somebody else’s fine man. And the whole process starts again.
Sheeeesh! I reveal the truth of the Universe, and all you guys care about is my puppy and his two boys! Weirdos! :p[/quote]
I’m quite frankly amazed to see a woman admit to this…

Have you figured out the punchline to this realization? If you ask me, the punchline is that fidelity is not in a man’s nature, and if you expect fidelity, you’re gonna spend a lot of nights either fretting about what he might do or disappointed in what he already did.

But I think most women will not admit to this, and would rather go through a constant succession of dating a fine man until the man cheats on her and then finding a new fine man who then cheats on her…

45

[quote=“Neo”][quote=“twonavels”]A man is only fine until you fall for him and get close enough to see all the flaws. Then you break up and he becomes somebody else’s fine man. And the whole process starts again.
Sheeeesh! I reveal the truth of the Universe, and all you guys care about is my puppy and his two boys! Weirdos! :p[/quote]
I’m quite frankly amazed to see a woman admit to this…

Have you figured out the punchline to this realization? If you ask me, the punchline is that fidelity is not in a man’s nature, and if you expect fidelity, you’re gonna spend a lot of nights either fretting about what he might do or disappointed in what he already did.

But I think most women will not admit to this, and would rather go through a constant succession of dating a fine man until the man cheats on her and then finding a new fine man who then cheats on her…[/quote]

Funny punchline!

A list of Forumosan’s I either know or suspect of being 100% faithful to their partners:

Maoman
Sandman
Tigerman
Spiral Architect
Toe Save
Alleycat
Miltownkid
Flicka (would be :wink: )

Okay…those I haven’t met, but would bet also fall into this category:

Omniloquacious
Mother Theresa
Wolf Reinhold

and I am pretty sure Almas John is 100% true to his beer.

did I miss any? Register for the “I am not a dog” A-List today…

46

[quote=“Toe Save”]did I miss any? Register for the “I am not a dog” A-List today…[/quote]It depends on definitions. Does having sex with other guys mean the same as, “at the same time as”?

47

A list of Forumosan’s I either know or suspect of being 100% faithful to their partners:

Maoman, Sandman, Tigerman, Spiral Architect, Toe Save, Alleycat, Miltownkid, Flicka… [/quote]
Can’t speak for the others, but please hold off on the kudos. I’ve been married for five minutes, and we have yet to encounter any serious difficulties in our life, no sick kids, no family tragedies, no insurmountable financial difficulties. And my wife just turned 26 years old! Yeah, I’m a hero for not straying… :laughing: I do aspire to fidelity though. I think it is sadly undervalued in our society. My dad had these words to say on the subject when he married us three months ago:

[quote=“Dear old dad”]We don

48

We have become a bit elegiac on this thread about a relationship that failed after 3 months…

By Maoman’s description you were dating The Crow wearing a Jason Mask??! You’re lucky you didn’t meet some horror movie end and he was just an unfaithful, aspiring movie monster who evidently likes guys too.

Look on the bright side: you’re a serious contender for a future in reality television.

49

[quote=“twonavels”]A man is only fine until you fall for him and get close enough to see all the flaws. Then you break up and he becomes somebody else’s fine man. And the whole process starts again.
Sheeeesh! I reveal the truth of the Universe, and all you guys care about is my puppy and his two boys! Weirdos! :p[/quote]

The quest for the truth comes in strange places :stuck_out_tongue:

Does “very good” come close enough? :stuck_out_tongue:

50

First of all, none of those suspected trustworthy men has actually been proven to never have strayed. In the court of public opinion, particularly with regards to sex, you are guilty until proven otherwise. I suspect some of them have in fact strayed. In fact, I would bet pretty decent money that statistics can’t be wrong and at least some straying has occured, though probably unbeknownst to the rest of us.

Second, you are now referring to married men. The original case was single men, whom I would say would have their dalliances more liberally than married men. But even with married men, it still happens and quite often. Haven’t you ever watched Divorce Court or Ricky Lake?

51

Especially in Taiwan. Haven’t any of you girls ever overheard the conversation around the office between the men, especially the married men? Geez, those guys go around bragging about cheating on their wives. They even brag about banging prostitutes - “I had two teenage girls in bed at the same time!” - well, shit yeah, I could do that, too, if I wanted to pay for it. :unamused: Fidelity apparently is not a valued concept in Chinese culture. To the contrary, it’s expected, and seen as a macho thing.

52

And yet HIV/AIDS is blamed on the foreign infidels, when in fact it’s trash like that that goes around banging some cheap prostitutes, most likely without protection, or takes “vacations” and “business trips” to Southeast Asia and comes back and passes it on to their wives and the men that they secretly mess around with in the saunas too. And jeez, now the Taiwanese government, being the protector of human rights that it is, is considering letting foreigners with HIV/AIDS stay for 14 days instead of being deported immediately. Wow, they really are so open-minded, caring, and aware of the source of the HIV/AIDS epedemic in Taiwan! :unamused:

53

Actually, at least 3 men on my list of suspects are not married.

And Ricky Lake??? Come on…be a little more substantive than trailer trash examples…please…

First of all, none of those suspected trustworthy men has actually been proven to never have strayed. In the court of public opinion, particularly with regards to sex, you are guilty until proven otherwise. I suspect some of them have in fact strayed. In fact, I would bet pretty decent money that statistics can’t be wrong and at least some straying has occured, though probably unbeknownst to the rest of us. [/quote]

It entirely depends on whether:

a) You are a dog.
b) You are a man.

I have known plenty of men who are stand-up guys. We love our ladies and could never think of lying to them. Our relationships are built on trust and respect. We are the same guys that wouldn’t think about erm, dating, some other guys g/f. When I first came here, I met this hot young thing…she spoke perfect English, she had tats and she appreciated the finer qualities of mid-afternoon scooby-snacks…and hot…did I mention that?

I was single and she was digging me bigtime…after two erm, dates, I found out she had a b/f she was living with. They were having an argument and she was staying at her Mom’s for a few weeks.

Hot or Not…Cool or Fool…Next!

The western notion of cheating is very loosely interpreted in these here parts for sure. In fact, I suspect some Taiwanese women might expect it from their Western counterparts as it is so often the norm for TW men. I have had conversations with well-to-do, educated, married women, all of whom have had hubbies working on the mainland. The subject of XLPs only made them bitter because of the expense they incurred. Some even were proud that they could afford an XLP, as if they were a high ticket luxury item.

To all this, I say baldercrap. I was raised the way I was raised and I am the kind of man I am. I am proud of my track record of fidelity. And of all generalizations that seem most insulting, this “all men are dawgs” one makes me hotter than a Hong Kong Rolex.

Try not playing games. Be honest about your feelings and trust your partner implicitly. Trust is not earned…it is freely given and freely taken away.

54

What I wonder is whether the husbands who cheat realize that it takes two to tango. Or as the old song goes, “Who’s making love to your old lady when you’re out making love?” I don’t know about you, but back home I usually didn’t have other men’s wives openly hitting on me; in Taiwan, on the other hand… Not that that’s a line I would want to cross, morally speaking (not even mentioning the culture being the way it is, I might get a paid a visit from hubbie’s “little friends”…I’ve known that to happen to at least one foreigner I knew). If only those morons knew how easily their bored and lonely wives would have a little fun of their own while he was “busy at the office working late”… :unamused:

55

Mod Lang: did the guy survive to tell the tale? Details!!!

P.S. Tainan does seems to have the bored-wife syndrome fairly well cornered. And yet, it’s considered lucky to have a wife from Tainan. Does that apply if you are just dipping as well?

56

1)Donald Trump
2)Kobe Bryant
3)William Clinton Jefferson
4)George W. Bush
5)George ‘daddy’ Bush
6)The Kenndeys
7)Micheal Jordan
8)Half of Capital Hill
9)Almost most of Hollywood’
10)Rudy Gulliani

And the list goes on and on and on

57

Joan Namastestore Rivers,

Are all of those claims substantiated?

Also, check Clinton’s name. How much is almost most? :wink:

58

1)Donald Trump-Got married to Marla when Ivana divorsed him because HE was sleeping with Marla

2)Kobe Bryant
Colorado Sex trial-bough a 4 carat purple diamond ring for the musses because of ‘cheating’

3)William Clinton Jefferson
The trial may have not proved anything, but Gennifer did

4)George W. Bush
Hmmm, so you think when he was drunk and coked up he was playing with Legos?

5)George ‘daddy’ Bush
The Grand Puba(and look at the young barbara)

6)The Kenndeys
Hmmm who didn’t Johnny and Bobby stick it too

7)Michael Jordan
Wifey almost divorced his behind in 2001 cause of it. Oh and there;s that little trial he had back a year or so ago with actual mistress…

8)Half of Capital Hill
Ummm, politics +power=SEX

9)Almost most of Hollywood’
Rite of passage

10)Rudy Gulliani
Umm, his current wife was once a mistress-TO HIM

59

What is XLP???

60

xiao lao pua (little wife)