Long but pithy!
Verbosity was definitely a thing in the 1900s. Maybe people were a bit smarter in those days and didn’t need every idea expressed in terms of facepalms, eggplants, and rainbows.
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Welcome to the club!
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Let me ponder what horrible punishment you deserve for dissing rainbows. I’ll get back to you…
?
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I’m a champion of rainbows and unicorns (especially against Comrade Finsky). Deal with it. 
“Freedom consists not in doing what we like, but in having the right to do what we ought.”
- Pope John Paul II
I guess it depends on where you put it. 
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“Human beings are born with different capacities. If they are free, they are not equal. And if they are equal, they are not free.”
― Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
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That’s what I learned from drugs.
“Rage Against the Machine never specified what type of machine they were furious with but I reckon it was probably a printer.”
–John Moynes
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“Kissing a straight guy was like eating a molten chocolate brownie sundae after a month of health food. Indulgent, delicious, but a little bit guilt-inducing.”
Read this on a book. Goddamn good quote.
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Whose quote?
The author’s.
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No, really? Care to share their name?
Lucy Lennox, but it’s a dumb romance novel so don’t read it.
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It took me so time to realize both verbs were in different tenses
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That was pretty gay.